Bookworm Has Bored One Too Many Holes In Their Home

Dear Tazi:

I am what people would call a bookworm. I love books, and I love reading them. I love they way books look on my bookshelves and I love the way I can just pull out an old favorite and start to read anytime I want, without having to go to the library. I love books. My problem is that I long ago ran out of places to put new books, but have continued to grow my collection. I have stacks of books on the floor next to my bookshelves, on top of the entertainment center, and even boxes of books in my attic!

I realize that I should probably get rid of some of the books that I have not read in a long time or did not enjoy as much as others; but my books, when added together, represent a financial investment worth thousands of dollars. I realize their resale value is nowhere near what I paid for them, so I hold onto them because I cannot justify throwing away something for which I originally paid so much and is still in good condition. Do you have any ideas on how I should handle my book storage problem?

Signed,
Bookworm

Dear Bookworm:

It is time to thin the herd and get rid of some of your books. This may sound like a painful process, but you mention that there are some books that you have not read in a long time or did not enjoy as much as others. You could start thinning your collection by going through these books and donating them to your local library, Salvation Army, or Goodwill Industries store. All three will give you a receipt for tax purposes, so you will not be "throwing away" something for which you paid good money and your donation will go to help others in need.

Once you have your book collection down to a reasonable size, you will have to work to make certain things do not get out of control again. There are a several options you could try:

1. For every new book you bring into the house, you must donate an old one.

2. You could start a book-share with your fellow bookworms, and lend or trade books you have read for books you have not read.

3. You could start to visit the local library, and instead of purchasing every book you want to read you could start borrowing from their collection. This option would even allow you to visit some of your old books.

4. You could buy an e-reader - they have come way down in price over the last few years, and the available options on them have greatly improved. The cost of e-books is anywhere from 50% - 75% off the cost of traditional books, with many ebooks available for free. If you are not certain that you would enjoy using an e-reader, that is another reason to visit your local library: many now offer e-readers and e-books on loan to patrons, so you could give one a trial run before investing.

5. You could try a combination of all of the above, which would mix the best of all worlds.

Happy reading, and thank you for including my column in your day!

Snuggles,
Tazi

Repost: Tazi's Corner #80 - It's A Jungle Out There!

Dear Readers,

This week I was mellowing out to Jethro Tull when "Bungle In The Jungle" started to play and I awoke with a snort. Jungle? Isn't that what we now call a tropical rain forest? It is, in fact, what we now call a tropical rain forest, but "Let's bungle in the tropical rain forest, well that's alright by me..." doesn't quite have the same groove to it. Of course, I think we can all agree that "rain forest" sounds much more sophisticated than "jungle". This is why we use it, isn't it? Aside from scientists and Greenpeace, nobody gave a hoot about the deforestation of the jungles until the more glamorous sounding "rain forest" came into popular use, and it has to be a tropical rain forest to sound trendy; tell most people that you live in the rain forests of the Pacific Northwest and they will look at you like you have three heads, and maybe even argue that rain forests are tropical (which is not true - there are, by scientific definition if not the popular one, temperate rain forests, too). This got me thinking about what else would lose it's charm, it's power, it's essential meaning if we set aside this simple word that sufficed for generations and used the popular eco-snobbery term that has taken hold.

Disney released The Jungle Book on Blu-Ray for the first time this week  [Ed. Note: SWEET!], a movie based upon All The Mowgli Stories by Rudyard Kipling and known to millions for generations. How silly would it be to update the title to The Rain Forest Book? Would some of the jungle magic that fascinates children and adults alike be lost? Speaking of jungle magic, the children's book turned movie Jumanji got its very name from those two root words. That's right, jumanji is not a Swahili or Afrikaans word at all; it is a made up word that was created by the author by recombining the letters of jungle and magic (and then getting a little creative, changing the "g" in magic to a second "j" to cleverly hide this fact). How exactly would rain forest and magic combine? Rainmanji? Do Dustin Hoffman and Tom Cruise star in the movie version? Or maybe Forestgumji? Is that too much of a stretch?

While on the subject of books that were turned into movies, I don't want to forget The Blackboard Jungle, a film that depicts the raw edges of life in the inner city (or ghettos, to use the tried and true word, lest I fall victim to my own accusations of snobbery). Times have changes since this movie was released in the 1950's and America's urban schools have gotten worse, not better. Which do you think best depicts the imagery of the violence that has besieged our young people? For me, The Blackboard Rain Forest doesn't make the cut.

For the open-minded/daring intellectual, we have Rita Mae Brown's  critically acclaimed 1973 novel Rubyfruit Jungle (upon which the 1985 short Me & Rubyfruit was loosely based). [Ed. Note: This one is not suitable for children!]. While Rubyfruit Rain Forest does have a nice ring to it due to its use of consonance, the word jungle maintains the sense of mystery and even fear that surrounds the themes of coming of age, sexual discovery, and coming out in an unforgiving world.

No reference to the jungle would be complete without mention of journalist Upton Sinclair's muckraking feat, The Jungle. While some would argue that it is a propaganda for the switch to socialism, none can argue against it's effect on the United States meat-packing industry and the effect it had on how it is run - specifically, this one work is responsible for the founding of what became the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (the FDA, formerly known as the Bureau of Chemistry). But...what if Sinclair had titled his book The Rain Forest? How laughably and pitifully tame that sounds in comparison to the raw energy the title The Jungle evokes!

Nowadays, the word jungle is all but forgotten by a new generation who have never learned the difference between a tropical and temperate rain forest; who have never heard of a rain forest being called anything but a rain forest. However, these are those of us who remember and praise the power of this humbled word. As for me, I will continue to praise the power of the jungle by refusing to let its name fall out of use.

Snuggles,
Tazi

P.S. Rain Forest Fever? Is that Spike Lee I hear weeping?


Ask Tazi! is ghostwritten by a human with Bachelors degrees in Communications and in Gender and Women's Studies. Tazi-Kat is not really a talking feline.

Repost: Tazi's Corner: Issue #6: Thoughts On Reading (Part II)

Hello, readers, and welcome to another edition of

Tazi's Corner
Life As Your Pet Sees It!
This week I present Part II of my thoughts on reading! Why the split piece? Because I know that attention spans can be short and when blogs are too long people lose interest - so I decided to take my cue from Quentin Tarantino a la Kill Bill and cut the blog into two parts!

In my meanderings for Part I of this topic (found in last week’s Tazi's Corner column), I found the Random House Publishers Collection of Must Read Books, which I also found to be rather pretentious. I am not saying the books on it were not excellent choices; but it was rather predictable with choices like Kurt Vonnegut’s Slaughterhouse Five (#18) and J.D. Salinger’s The Catcher in the Rye (#64). Maybe I am biased...I used to know a pretentious blowhard who said those were his favorite books; but the fact remains that these books are what are referred to a “serious books”, as if a Writer (with a capital W) is only a writer (with a lower-case w) until he or she has published one, and until then they will only be a producer of pulp – interesting but unmemorable. I find this thought unacceptable! Jaws is not what I would call a “serious” book but it is definitely worth reading (just not on the beach) and is most certainly memorable. In fact, it makes my personal list of classic books, along with Mario Puzo’s The Godfather (yes, it was a book before it was a movie).

I have decided to add my paw-print to the numerous online lists of literary classics by adding my own right here. In no particular order after the number one spot, I present

Tazi’s List of 39 Must Read Modern 

(and Not So Modern) Classics! 

Please feel free to add suggestions of your own to bring the list to a less random number:

1. To Kill a Mockingbird, by Harper Lee

2. Cold Sassy Tree, by Olive Ann Burns

3. Brothers and Sisters, by Bebe Moore Campbell

4. Your Blues Ain’t Like Mine, by Bebe Moore Campbell

5. The Godfather, by Mario Puzo

6. Jaws, by Peter Benchley

7. The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe, by C.S. Lewis

8. The Hobbit, by J.R.R. Tolkien

9. The Lord of the Rings (complete trilogy), J.R.R. Tolkien

10. It, by Stephen King

11. The Complete Works of William Shakespeare*, by William Shakespeare**

12. The Complete Works of Edgar Allen Poe, by E.A. Poe

13. Beloved, by Toni Morrison

14. Treasure Island, by Robert Lewis Stevenson

15. A Christmas Carol (annotated edition), by Charles Dickens

16. Le Comte De Monte Cristo/The Count of Monte Cristo, by Alexandre Dumas 

(English translation or original French)

17. Le Fantôme de L’Opéra/The Phantom of the Opera, by Gaston Leroux 

(English translation or original French)

18. Le Petit Prince/The Little Prince, by Antoine de Saint-Exupery 

(English translation or original French)

19. Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone (aka Philosopher’s Stone, U.K. version), by J.K. Rowling

20. Little Women, by Louisa May Alcott

21. The Adventures of Tom Sawyer, by Mark Twain

22. Sula, by Toni Morrison

23. How the Garcia Girls Lost Their Accents, by Julia Alvarez

24. The Joy Luck Club, by Amy Tan

25. The Maltese Falcon, by Dashiell Hammett

26. The Color Purple, by Alice Walker

27. Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Cafe, by Fannie Flagg

28. The Legend of Sleepy Hollow, by Washington Irving

29. Johnny Tremain, by Esther Forbes

30. All the President’s Men, by Carl Bernstein and Bob Woodward (non-fiction)

31. In Cold Blood, by Truman Capote (non-fiction)

32. Leaves of Grass, by Walt Whitman

33. Charlotte's Web, by E.B. White (read it aloud to a child!)

If Wishbone can pull off this gig, so can we!

34. The Cider House Rules, by John Irving

35. The Princess Bride, by William Goldman (It was a book first? INCONCEIVABLE!)

36. The Last Unicorn, by Peter S. Beagle

37. The Westing Game, by Ellen Raskin

38. The DaVinci Code (fully illustrated version), by Dan Brown

39. And Then There Were None (Ten Little Indians, U.K. version), by Agatha Christie

Apologies to Derek P. of South Carolina for leaving Hollywood Wives, by Jackie Collins, off of this list.

Snuggles,
Tazi

*Contrary to the title, it is not all of the works of William Shakespeare
**Some contend that Sir Francis Bacon deserves author credit for this selection


Ask Tazi! is ghostwritten by a human with a Bachelors of Arts in Communications. Tazi-Kat is not really a talking feline.

Fan of Teen Dream Wonders If Her Development Has Been Arrested

Dear Tazi:

I am in my mid-thirties, and when I was young I was totally addicted to the Sweet Valley High books that all the girls would read. My childhood wasn't the greatest, by Sweet Valley standards - I wasn't popular, wasn't stand-out pretty, and wasn't rich - so I would escape into the world of Elizabeth and Jessica Wakefield, fantasizing that I was one of their friends.

Over the years, my friends stopped reading the Sweet Valley books, but I never did. Even now, on a bad day, I will slip into my fantasy world of Sweet Valley High School and feel my stress melt away. My question is, am I normal? Are there others out there like me? Or am I, like my mother tells me, in need of therapy? For the record, I am successful in my career and happy with my life overall.

Signed,
Jessica's Biggest Fan!

Dear Jessica's Biggest Fan!:

Some people combat the stress of a bad day by drinking; others by abusing their loved ones, both physically and emotionally. These are the people who require therapy. As for whether or not you would benefit from a few trips to a counselor, ask yourself: Are you otherwise well-adjusted? Do you relate to others on an adult level? If you read for enjoyment, do you read age-appropriate materials? Do you understand that the standard of living in the Sweet Valley High books is completely out of touch with reality?

What '80's/'90's girl didn't LOVE Sweet Valley High?

If you were able to answer "yes" to all of the above questions, I would say that you are a perfectly normal, well-adjusted adult and that your mother has no reason to worry. If, however, you answered "no" to any (or all) of the above questions, it would appear that you are suffering from arrested development and a few sessions with a counselor could help you in overcoming whatever it is about the real world that is stressing you back to childhood.

Snuggles,
Tazi

Tazi's Corner #51 - Adventures In Downsizing

Dear Readers:

This week my Mommie officially finished all of her degree coursework (Commencement may have been in May, but she is an August graduate). On her first day off without schoolwork in close to two years she decided to clean the house, something that has been neglected in her quest for academic excellence.

Now, when Mommie cleans she does not just dust and straighten; she empties drawers, sorts through shelves, and usually ends up with large piles of stuff to donate or discard. I usually stay out of her way when she does this because I do not care to end up in either of those piles (remember, I am a rescue pet) but on this particular day I could not because she was “cleaning” her office, which is where my cat-nap bed and favorite feeding station are both located. This is how I came upon some interesting information.

Mommie was cleaning out all of her old academic stuff that she has saved over the years – hard copies of research papers, Honor Societies membership certificates, and textbooks dealing with things like Calculus and Organic Chemistry – hardly the stuff of light reading. While the certificates went into the desk drawer and the hard copies of research papers went in the trash (she has them backed up electronically) the books got set aside to donate to a lending library for students who cannot afford to purchase textbooks. She managed to clean off and entire shelf of her bookcase when she decided to tackle her non-academic books. Soon, she had a large pile of stuff to donate to her local library. Again.

“Again?” you ask? Mommie and I moved twice in two years – first from the house she grew up in, where reading was always encouraged (from Troll Book Club to the Book of the Month Club). In our bedroom, on the bookshelf-style nightstand sits the entire Harry Potter collection, along with her childhood copies of the Chronicles of Narnia (both collections in hardcover) and a few of her leather-bound classics, like Little Women and the Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, gifts from people who know that she is a bibliophile. These treasures will see the donation bin over her cold, dead body!

Mommie’s book collection grew ostensibly over the years, so much so that she either donated or sold over 100 books when we moved the first time, yet somehow her collection continued to grow! After we moved the second time, she promised herself she would start collecting eBooks and she even bought herself a Nook Tab with that intention! So far, she hasn't had time for much pleasure reading (senior year at university can be quite demanding) but she has managed to buy the electronic or audio version of most books she buys! While eBooks are incredibly convenient (an eReader makes it easy to carry KenFollett books in your purse!), there is nothing like the comfort of sitting on a good book that someone is trying to read.

I'm (not!) sorry, were you reading this?

I think it fascinating how what we choose to downsize reflects what we value the most. While Mommie has shelves full of Victoria’s secret body sprays and Elizabeth Taylor perfumes, she has also thrown out many more bottles of creams, lotions, and perfumes than she has actually kept. During our first move she cried when several of her porcelain collectibles were broken by clumsy hands, but she took a deep breath and said aloud, “IT’S JUST STUFF!!!” reminding herself that human relationships are more important than inanimate objects. She was freely able to yard sale most of her crystal, her party dresses from days gone by, odd pieces of furniture, and about 500 audio cassettes from the 1980’s (does anyone else remember bands like The Outfield and The Jets?). Her books were another story…

It has been two years and every now and then she finds herself looking for a particular book that she loved but can no longer find. She resigns herself, with a heavy sigh, that it was probably donated or sold during one of her moves and accepts the fact that she will have to buy the electronic version. Every now and then she will get a mailer for leather-bound classic books – “COLLECT THEM ALL!” screams the flyer – and she will longingly look at the fine bindings and the gold leaf lined pages before tossing it into the trash with the rest of the junk mail.

Sigh...maybe someday

Recently, she and my Daddy decided to join the Audible.com book club and she is currently looking for an eBook club to join. Progress may be practical, but nobody ever said it was not painful. Now, onto the closets and those size 5 jeans she will probably never wear again…

Snuggles,

Tazi

Ask Tazi! is ghostwritten by a human with a Bachelors of Arts in Communications. Tazi-Kat is not really a talking feline.

RePost - Tazi's Corner #7: Searching For Atticus, By Guest Writer Tazi's Mommie

Hello Readers!

I am taking a vacation day, and instead of leaving Mommie in charge of this week's edition of Tazi's Corner (because she might mess it up on me!), I have decided to print a classic edition that I know was successful. Enjoy the "freepeat".

--T.K.


Snuggles from AC,
Tazi

Tazi's Corner
Life As Your Pet Sees It!

Searching For Atticus
by Guest Writer Tazi's Mommie

I consider myself to be a Writer, not only because it is what I have done professionally for so many years, but because once upon a time I made a living doing it. How many people are lucky enough to be able to say that? How many people are lucky enough to have a reason to induce a sugar-fueled madness through a Hershey bar and a large bottle of Mountain Dew, let alone induce this stupor at the office? My old boss used to tell me to do what I must to keep my creativity flowing. The sacrifices I would make!

Over time, even sugar is not enough to take a wrecking ball to writer's block; sometimes, a different kind of inspiration is needed. Who inspires me to write? The most influential man in my life - as a writer and as a person - is not a real person at all, but a literary character named Atticus Finch.

Ironically, Atticus came into my life the same summer my real father left it; the summer I was 12-years-old. I remember that summer well; it was the season that followed the spring that my dog got hit by a car. Rascal lived, minus her lower-left hindquarter, and her resilience taught me that it was true what people say: what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. She learned how to run like the wind on only three legs when it came time to chase after me on my bike, as well as how to play the part of the brave invalid when in view of neighbors with dog treats. The world may have shattered a bone or two in her body, but it did not break her spirit. I wish I could say I had the same emotional fortitude as my dog did that summer, but that would almost be a lie – almost; because at some point that summer I became acquainted with Atticus Finch. Who knew that a summer reading assignment would come to have such an influence on my life?

The school bell rang shortly after we had received our reading assignments, dismissing us to an awaiting ice cream truck and a world of summer freedoms; our summer homework assignments already forgotten, if just for the moment – our parents would see to it that we promptly remembered them. Although our choices for entertainment were endless; our reading selections were not. Accustomed to the usual Beverly Cleary and Judy Blume stories of our childhood past, we were a bit frightened by what the seventh grade had in store for us, as our assigned options appeared to reflect the démonté of our childhood.

I can still recall my friend Rachel repetitively droning on about how she planned to read To Kill a Mockingbird because she had heard it was a really good book. She could not tell me anything about the story and I, who was making my way through the anthologies of Stephen King and J.R.R. Tolkien, thought the title To Kill a Mockingbird sounded far too much like the children’s poem “Who Killed Cock Robin?” I bought the book anyway because compared to my other choices – The Grapes of Wrath, The Old Man and the Sea and Animal Farm – it seemed to be the least offensive to my pre-teen sensibilities. I considered myself to be far too mature to read about talking animals! Once in hand I promptly decided that To Kill a Mockingbird was not worth my time. This opinion was based on the book’s plain, un-illustrated, mustard-yellow cover. Yes, bibliophile that I was (and still am), I judged a book by its cover.

My copy of To Kill a Mockingbird – now creased and careworn – sat on my bedroom desk until the start of August which was when I realized that, like it or not, my mother was not going to allow me to buy the Cliff’s Notes version of it; the local librarian looked positively apoplectic when I had asked if she had a copy of the shelves. Already miserable because my father had decided to take Paul Simon’s advice and “slip out the back, Jack” I figured my summer could get no worse. I opened to the first page and read these words: “When he was nearly thirteen, my brother Jem got his arm badly broken at the elbow.”

“My brother Jem,” I thought. “Isn’t Jem a girl’s name?” At the time Jem and the Holograms was Hasbro’s answer to Mattel’s Barbie. I read a little further and discovered that the character of Scout was a girl and grew curious as to how people down South lived. Being a native New Englander, I had only heard stories of the Deep South; none of them all that kind to Confederates. As I got deeper and deeper into the tome that was my summer reading assignment, something inside me stirred. My child-like sense of justice – of right and wrong being either/or but never both – flared inside of me. Why did these people want to hurt Atticus? What was wrong with them? They were supposed to be his friends! Why were they siding against Tom Robinson, an innocent man “whose only true sin was pity for white woman”?

By the time I reached the end of the book I was so disgusted with Maycomb County that the enormity of what “Boo” Radley had done completely escaped me – which is why I read To Kill a Mockingbird again the very next summer; and the summer after that; and the summer after that; and every summer to this day. It was on or around my twelfth reading of the book that I caught on to the fact that Jem did not kill Bob Ewell. I cannot understand why I did not catch on sooner. Perhaps it was my outrage at the sense of injustice I felt; perhaps it was my anger over being told (by native Alabamans) that not much has changed in Alabama since the Civil War, and that Harper Lee’s story could be as true today as it was when she wrote it. I think the real reason it took so long for me to process the truth about who killed Bob Ewell was that Atticus could not process it. Over the years, I had learned to look at Atticus as the father-figure I needed in my life. To me, Atticus was a God among men; His only weakness his blind love for his children. He was a man who believed in his children; a man who raised them to become the pillars of justice he sought for the future of humankind. To a child who had been abandoned by her father, Atticus made a fine surrogate; a living example of all that was good in a world full of ugliness.

I have spent the better part of my life searching for Atticus, inside and outside of myself. I have never giving in to the pessimistic view that such a person can only exist in fiction; that the real world would have jaded him by now, worn his ideals down to a stub of their original grace or corrupted him in one of the many political trade-offs that occur in order to make the business of politics run, and keep the politics of business in check. I know he is out there, though, for I have caught glimpses of him. It is these glimpses that keep my hopes alive. I know that Atticus lives; he lives in the hearts and the minds of all who seek to emulate him.


It was the summer of my seventeenth reading of To Kill a Mockingbird that a young boy I watched over picked up a copy of it for himself. He was eleven years old, a year younger than I was when I first felt the magic of Harper Lee’s masterpiece, and like me he was too young to process all of the goings-on in the world that Atticus, Jem, and Scout inhabited. Small for his age, he curled in my lap and cried at the injustice of Tom Robinson’s conviction and death; at the blatant prejudice that engulfed the human psyche. As he dried his tears, he looked up at me with watery eyes and said, “When I grow up I want to be just like Atticus!” Holding back tears of pride, I kissed his forehead; rocked him gently; and told him I could think of no nobler calling. To this day, I still cannot.

--Tazi's Mommie


Ask Tazi! is ghostwritten by a human with a Bachelors of Arts in Communications. Tazi-Kat is not really a talking feline.

Tazi's Corner #5: Thoughts On Reading (Part I)

Happy Sunday Readers! Today I share my thoughts on reading! I won't bore you with introductory blather - today I get right down to business by bringing you Issue #5 of

Tazi's Corner
Life As Your Pet Sees It!
Something only a few people know about my Mommie is that she practices her professional speaking voice by reading aloud to me. I snuggle in her lap and hear whatever story she happens to be reading. On one recent day it was The Running Man by Richard Bachman/Stephen King and I was startled out of my lull by a jarring sentence: “Who reads anymore?” Who reads anymore, indeed! It seems that we are so tied up with our electronics (even books are electronic now!) that the question – written over thirty years ago in a setting that takes place in our near future – had an eerie sense of omniscience.

Who reads anymore, indeed? This week’s passing of literary giant Gore Vidal brought out the painful truth, as Facebook flooded with regret of the passing of the world’s most famous hairstylist. For the record, they were thinking of Vidal Sassoon, who passed away this past May. Here to explain the difference is my dear friend Derek P. of North Carolina:

Friend of Derek P.: OMG, Gore Vidal just died - I LOVED his shampoo!!

Derek P.: That’s Vidal Sassoon you idiot.

Friend of Derek P: Oh - I get them confused ALL the time.

Derek P.: Yeah I can see why - Gore Vidal is a GAY WWII Vet, Brilliant Writer, Activist and Politician!! While Vidal Sassoon was a STRAIGHT guy who was famous for being a hairdresser!!

I’d give those who confused the two men a Tazi Paw Slap of Disgust, but I think the Gay Verbal Beotch-Slapping just administered will suffice.

Now that I have dispensed with the formalities, the question of the day remains: What makes a book a classic? What do some books have that make generation after generation identify them to the point where even people who do not enjoy reading enjoy them. What is it about these books that make people who have no time to read find the time to read them? What is it about their appeal that makes Hollywood turn these books into movies, giving them an even greater following? As a writer, one who seeks fame and fortune enough to make it onto Page Six of the New York Post, these are questions to which I need answers. Is there anybody out there who can give them?

A part of me would guess it is because we can relate their storylines to our everyday lives; but then I wonder: Who exactly can relate to the Marquise de Merteuil of Les Liaisons Dangereuse and why are they walking free? (For those unfamiliar with the book or the movie version of it, Dangerous Liaisons, it was modernized into the Reese Witherspoon movie Cruel Intentions, with Ms. Witherspoon in the Marquise de Merteuil role). Which of us would ever put up with the meddling ways of Jane Austen’s title character Emma? Amusing as her matchmaking is in the book, which of us would put up with it in real life? (For those of you unfamiliar with the book Emma, you can rent the Gwyneth Paltrow movie based on the book). I am not even going to touch The Scarlet Letter by Nathanial Hawthorne (and played marvelously by Demi Moore in the movie version). If we read as a form of escape, why would we wish to be faced with our own shortcomings through the printed word?

Several years ago Nintendo DS (yes, the video game people; ironic, huh?) came out with a list of 100 Must Read Classic Books. In looking through it, my Mommie realized she had read about eighty of them; starting with Little Women (#1) when she was a child, home sick with the flu, and finishing with Treasure Island (#90), a college reading assignment. When she heard that the average person has only read six books on the list, it made her very sad. Why were people not reading these wonderful stories? There is more to books than Twilight and Harry Potter! Simply put, a child’s childhood is not complete without exposure to Long John Silver (the literary character, not the fast-food restaurant); Christmas is not complete without a reading of Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol. As awesome as I find Muppet Treasure Island (Mommie has a crush on Tim Curry!) and A Muppet Christmas Carol (Michael Caine at his best!) the levity of the performance leaves behind the deep emotional connection that occurs with the printed word. Perhaps this is what makes a book a classic: It brings about an emotional connection between the reader and the story; one that must be shared, and can be shared across generations. Mommie’s favorite book collections are C.S. Lewis’ The Chronicles of Narnia and J.R.R. Tolkien’s The Lord of the Rings; she gave copies of both to the boys she used to babysit, now college students, and one of her cherished memories was the look on their faces when they received them: Pure unadulterated joy.

A good book is timeless! Do your part to pass on the wonder to a new generation!

Snuggles,
Tazi

P.S. If this column sounds a bit truncated,m that is because it is! Come back next week for Part II of this column, when I will present Tazi’s List of 39 Must Read Modern (and Not So Modern) Classics!


Ask Tazi! is ghostwritten by a human with a Bachelors of Arts in Communications. Tazi-Kat is not really a talking feline.

Christmas Is Over, But Friend Expects Perpetual Presents

Dear Tazi-Kat:

I have this particular friend that I go out with often; however this friend of mine seems to be using me. Every time we go out I have to pay her share because she complains she doesn't have any money, because she collects social security. However, after going out with her she frequently asks me to stop at Barnes and Noble so she can buy books about vampires, and she spends 30 dollars or more; or she will spend her money on iTunes cards. When I confront her about it she says she doesn't get much to spend. However, the amount she dishes out for these items is money that I wish I had to spend.

In addition to these spending habits, she complains of being very lonely. Now, after looking at her patterns, I can see why she doesn't keep her friendships. I would like to tell her why she doesn't have many friends; but I don't want to sound harsh. For me, I can't keep a friendship going on me dishing out the money all the time and not getting money back in return (for the gas I use in my car to take her out and for the costs of the entertainment). What would you do in this situation?

Signed,
Worn-Out Friend

Dear Worn-Out Friend:

You mention that your friend is on social security. Considering her spending habits, she is either a very hip senior citizen, or a young person on social security disability benefits. Just this past Christmas my Co-Mommie and her friend (both “seniors”) were commenting on how technology has gotten ahead of them, and that they are content with their VHS tapes and big-box TV's; so I am going to go out on a limb and guess that your friend is a younger person on SSD benefits who has a lot to learn.

In this economy, many humans are having a difficult time making ends meet, which means there is a lot less money left over for entertainment, fuel, food, catnip (sorry, I had to slip that one in there!), etc.; so your friend’s argument that she is on a fixed-income and that she “doesn’t get much to spend” is painfully self-absorbed. You have every right to be upset with her over her attitude, especially if she never offers to reciprocate in any way.

You mention that she is running out of friends, and from the sound of your letter you are ready to close the door on her, too. Before you do that, for the sake of the friendship, offering her some friendly advice could be the nicest thing you could do for her – even if it seems harsh to do so.

The next time the two of you make plans to get together, suggest that this time you each pay your own tab. If your friend is okay with this arrangement, your problem is solved! However, if she complains that she cannot afford it – as I suspect she will – gently point out the fact that the money she spends on books and iTunes cards could more than pay her tab, leaving her some left over for the goodies that you would also like to purchase for yourself, but cannot because you are constantly subsidizing her entertainment budget.

If your friend gets angry or defensive, tell her you mean no offense, but that you feel cheated; that the friendship has turned into a one-way street with all of the benefits going directly towards her. Explain that the books she purchases could probably be borrowed (for free) from the local library; and the iTunes songs she purchases can be heard on the radio or purchased for less through a different mp3 provider, such as Yahoo! Music or Amazon.com, which offers thousands of entire mp3 albums for $5 or less (many are free); and the most current music for the same price or less than what iTunes charges for the same songs. An online radio service like Pandora Internet Radio will allow her to listen to her customized musical tastes for free.

If, after offering these very reasonable suggestions, your friend is still claiming poverty and not willing to pay her own way I would broach the idea that her self-absorption could be what is driving people away; that few people are willing to go to the financial lengths you have to maintain a friendship. This will almost certainly upset her to the point she will push you away, hurling blame at you in order to push it away from where it belongs – squarely upon her.

If things reach this point, the only options remaining will be to continue with the status quo; look for low cost and free forms of entertainment; or choose to take a step back from the friendship and get together/go out places less often. Regardless of your decision, you will at least have had your say on the matter; and given your friend some things to consider. If she continues to believe that there is nothing wrong with her behavior, I predict that she will find herself all the lonelier. Therefore, depending on her age and her health, she may have a very long and lonely life to look forward to if she does not change her ways. This is something you may also want to mention.

Snuggles,
Tazi-Kat