Dogs And Children Are Not Always Welcome Visitors, So Plan Accordingly

Dear Tazi:

My sister-in-law, “Elle”, is one of those people who thinks her dogs are her children and that they should be welcome anywhere children are welcome. The problem is that she owns two very large German shepherds. Every time she comes over to visit, which is a lot more frequently than I would like, she insists on bringing these unwelcome creatures with her.

Tazi, it is not that I do not like dogs; I just do not like them in my home. I have two young children and an indoor cat that are all terrorized by the mere presence of these animals. I have tried to explain to Elle why she cannot bring her dogs inside my house (I have no problem with her leaving them in my fenced yard) but she takes the matter far too personally, asking me how I found feel if she relegated my children to the yard when we come to visit her. The irony of that statement is that she has several rooms that are “off-limits” to the children when we visit, and I have no problem with this arrangement. When I point this out to her she insists that it is not the same thing.

Tazi, my children are only 4 and 2 – far too young to fight off a large and powerful dog should it decide it wants to “play” with them. My elder daughter is scared of these two shepherds and my younger is not fully socialized around dogs; I am afraid that she will try to pull the dog’s tail and end up getting mauled. My sister-in-law is insulted that I would even suggest that either of her dogs would do such a thing and tells me I am overreacting. I was bitten by a dog as a young child, and had to have extensive plastic surgery to repair the damage, so maybe I am being a bit overcautious but I cannot help the way that I feel. These are my children! What do you have to say on the matter, little cat?

Signed,
Scaredy Cat

Dear Scaredy Cat:

And your cat. These are your children and your cat, right? Just checking…in your panic you seem to have forgotten that Fluffy’s safety is also at risk, too, since cats pose a temptation for dogs to chase.


I'm tough, I know it...

Your sister-in-law sounds very self-centered. You have offered a reasonable compromise – to allow her dogs to play in your yard which, I am certain, they would prefer to being cooped up in the house – and she has refused to agree to this reasonable arrangement. Is there a deeper issue that runs between the two of you? Is she resentful that you married her brother? Since she visits “a lot more frequently” than you would like I am detecting an unusually close relationship between the two of them that puts you in the position of outsider. This should not be so in a marriage; as close as siblings might be, vows have been taken to put one’s spouse before all others. It is time for your husband to do just that.

Since Elle refuses to honor your wishes or accept any compromise that you suggest it is time that your husband step up to the plate and tell her himself: the dogs are not allowed inside the house. Your concerns for your children are sound; a two year old should not be left unsupervised with an animal – not even for a few minutes. A child’s cry can sound like a wounded animal, awakening an animal’s natural instincts; a child’s natural curiosity could result in injury to both the dog and the human.

If your husband refuses to back you up on this matter, you are going to have to take matters into your own hands. When Elle comes to visit you can take the children to the playground…or the movies…or the toddler gym…or wherever the dogs are not, even if it is to the backyard to play on their swing-set. Also be sure to isolate the cat in a closed room that the dogs cannot enter – for her safety, as well as theirs. When cats scratch another animal, we go for the face!

Snuggles,
Tazi


Ask Tazi! is ghostwritten by a human with a Bachelors of Arts in Communications. Tazi-Kat is not really a talking feline.

New Restaurant Owner Has A "Teacup" Of Trouble On His Hands

Dear Tazi:

I have spent years as an Executive Chef in a fine restaurant and am finally realizing my dream of opening my own restaurant. I grew up with very little, worked my way through college and up the ladder of success, and am still a little nervous when dealing with the "upper crust". I guess there is still a little of that poor kid from Brooklyn still inside me.

As a Chef, I always worked in the kitchen and heard the stories that the servers and the Maitre 'D would discuss - not so much of bad food (I can understand personal tastes, and am always ready to "fix" a dish to the guest's preference) - but of poorly behaved guests. One of the more difficult issues is women who bring their dogs into the restaurant with them. I do not mean service animals, but purse-sized "teacup" dogs that they try to smuggle in and then feed from the table. Even if the Department of Health did not outlaw this practice, I would not allow it in my establishment. In addition to being unsanitary, customers have allergies and even the best trained dog can mess if it can't hold it in any longer.

In the past, I was always in the kitchen and never had to be the one to deal with an outraged customer who insisted that her "Fluffums" (it was always a woman) is well-behaved and would "simply go crazy" waiting in the car. The more the dining room staff tried to be polite about the situation the worse it would get, until someone at the table would step in and side with the staff. Being an established restaurant, this place could easily handle the threats made about "never coming here again". Right, lady...see you next week at your regular time and table!

As a new restaurant, my establishment is going to need some time to build up a reputation for service - thankfully, my reputation as a Chef follows me, but I am nervous about how to handle the potential dog problem. A sign saying "No Dogs Allowed" seems so bourgeois and is not in the image I seek to present. I realize you are a "cat", but do you have any solutions regarding dogs?

Signed,
Chef

Dear Chef:

Congratulations on the opening of your new restaurant! This must be both an exciting and stressful time for you. I admire the fact that you are looking to steer clear of any problems before they occur - that is the behavior of a successful business owner!

I realize that there are people who insist that their precious pooches are practically human, but there are health codes to uphold. Therefore, I have two words for you: doggie nursery. If you have a small room near the entrance (like a sizable coat room) or a heated outbuilding, you could outfit it as an area for patrons to "check" their dogs before entering the dining area. I realize it sounds crazy, but is no crazier than those who would bring a dog into a restaurant with them.

A few decades ago ago, my Mommie ran the child-care at a small, family-owned fitness facility. The big gyms thought it was crazy to have child care, until they started losing their female clients to the smaller gym with the child-care. Now, many gyms and fitness centers offer child-care as a part of membership. Obviously, you would have to have size/weight limits on the dogs (say, 8 pounds and under) but you could provide sleeping crates, toys, and other amenities (including a staff member to oversee it all) that will keep a dog busy for a few hours while its owner eats dinner. If the problem is as rampant as you make it sound, a doggie nursery could be a selling point for your customers.

If this idea is something that does not work for you, have your staff give a gentle reminder that there are "No Pets Allowed" when patrons call to make a reservation. If they still show up with a pet in tow, you have given them fair warning; have the Maitre 'D explain that the dog is not allowed in the dining room. Should the dog remain unnoticed until the party is seated, you should not feel nervous about approaching them and asking them to remove their dog from the dining area. Would you allow someone who is improperly dressed to enter your restaurant? Would you allow someone to remove his pants because he ate too much, and they were feeling too tight? If it helps, picture such a scenario as you approach the table or use such an analogy to remind the dog owner that you are not picking on them; you are simply enforcing the rules of the establishment and the Board of Health.

I wish you bon appétit et bon chance! with your new restaurant!

Snuggles,
Tazi

EXTRA EDITION: Congratulations, Malachy!

Dear Readers:

I would like to take a moment and congratulate a member of the canine community on his Best in Show win at the 2012 Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show!

Congratulations, Malachy!

He may be a dog, but he's a small dog - heck, I weigh more than he does! - and we small animals must stick together!

Snuggles,
Tazi


Ask Tazi! is ghostwritten by a human with a Bachelors of Arts in Communications. Tazi-Kat is not really a talking feline.