Dear Tazi:
What am I going to do with my son? Seriously, I need to know what to do with the man! “Robert” is 43 years old, never married, and still living with me without contributing to the household expenses. He has never, ever moved out of his childhood bedroom and still sleeps in the twin bed he had growing up. Robert originally went to college to study Criminal Justice because he wanted to be a police officer. Unfortunately, after four years of college he failed the physical exam for every police force in the region due to his slow running skills. Apparently, a police officer that cannot run fast is not an asset to the force. Although he never told me so exactly, I believe this is what also kept him out of the Army; which he applied for after being rejected by more than a dozen police outfits.
What am I going to do with my son? Seriously, I need to know what to do with the man! “Robert” is 43 years old, never married, and still living with me without contributing to the household expenses. He has never, ever moved out of his childhood bedroom and still sleeps in the twin bed he had growing up. Robert originally went to college to study Criminal Justice because he wanted to be a police officer. Unfortunately, after four years of college he failed the physical exam for every police force in the region due to his slow running skills. Apparently, a police officer that cannot run fast is not an asset to the force. Although he never told me so exactly, I believe this is what also kept him out of the Army; which he applied for after being rejected by more than a dozen police outfits.
Robert took an unfulfilling, dead-end job in office supply
sales to make ends meet when he decided what he really wanted to do was
teach. I think he liked the idea of a
flexible schedule and summers off, he insisted that he wanted to “help mold the
minds of the next generation”. Four
years later (spent getting a second Bachelor’s and a Masters in Education)
Robert decided he did not like teaching, but would “tough it out” until he was
able to pay off his student loans (I paid for his first degree only).
Robert has spent the last ten years teaching on-again
off-again and complaining how much he hates his job, calling out sick as often
as he is allowed – sometimes too often, which has resulted in his
termination. Contrary to popular belief,
teachers can get fired; especially if they do not have tenure or even
seniority. I showed him your letter
about jobs that you can do with a degree in education that do not involve
teaching, but he said he had no interest in any of them.
Robert has now decided that the reason he has been so
unfulfilled in his work and romantic relationships is because God is calling
him to be a man of the cloth. He is
looking into entering the seminary to study for the Roman Catholic priesthood,
which would be fine with me if it did not mean I would have to pay off the
remainder of his student debts and send him a monthly stipend to ensure he does
not incur further debt while “studying for God”.
If Robert did not have such a spotted past when it came to
his career, I would be more than happy to assist him in this new endeavor;
however, I am afraid that Robert is looking for free room and board from someone
new now that I am getting older and looking to retire to Florida. Do you think I should take a chance on my
son, Tazi? Or should I allow him to take
this leap of faith on his own?
Signed,
Signed,
Losing Faith
Dear Losing Faith:
Your son is 43 years old and still trying to find himself, this is obvious. If you would like to continue supporting him; have the means to do so; and honestly believe that the reason he has failed in all of his career endeavors so far is because he is being thwarted by God in order to push him on the right path than by all means go for it. If you have doubts, though…
Your son is 43 years old and still trying to find himself, this is obvious. If you would like to continue supporting him; have the means to do so; and honestly believe that the reason he has failed in all of his career endeavors so far is because he is being thwarted by God in order to push him on the right path than by all means go for it. If you have doubts, though…
The fact that your son chose a career in which he was not
physically able to perform is regrettable, but I will give him a pass. I believe everyone is entitled to a do-over;
his just happened a little sooner than expected. The fact that your son hated teaching from
the moment he set foot in the classroom leads me to believe that you are
correct in thinking he was seeking summers off rather than fulfilling a desire
to “mold the minds of the next generation”.
You have done what you can in assisting your son in his
quest for career fulfillment. You have
generously allowed him to live with you free of charge so he could pay off his
student loans that much sooner. You have
no reason to feel guilty should you decide to let your son sink or swim on his
own. It is not like you are telling him to jump off of a cliff and promising that angels will catch him (Matthew 4:11); you have been his angel for quite some time. If
the priesthood is your son's desire, he can make a financial plan that involves paying
off his student loans and saving up for his future as a seminarian – and as a
Catholic priest, because the “free room and board” deal ends at retirement.
Snuggles,
TaziAsk Tazi! is ghostwritten by a human with a Bachelors of Arts in Communications. Tazi-Kat is not really a talking feline.
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