Dear Tazi:
When I was a child, I was very accident prone. I would “trip over air” as my mother put
it. Because of my numerous trips to the
emergency room child services kept a close eye on my home; the concern was
appreciated, but unnecessary. Now that I
am an adult I am a parent myself, and I am extra careful with my children –
perhaps too careful.
I realize that times have changed and that child protection
has improved since I was a kid – it is now a crime to fail to report suspected
child abuse – and I am scared to death of losing my children because they fell
out of their tree-house or hurt themselves skateboarding. Because of this, I have not allowed my children
to have a tree-house or to play in their friends trees; nor have I allowed them
to skateboard or roller-blade or enjoy any of the childhood pastimes that I
enjoyed when I was their age.
My wife and I argue regularly about how much caution is too
much caution to take; she says that we should let our children be children,
that a certain amount of risk is healthy and will help them to grow into
well-adjusted adults ready to take on the world. I want to agree with my wife, but I live in
fear of that knock on the door from child services and the thought of my
children being removed from our home until after we clear investigation. Yesterday, I lost my temper when I learned
that my wife allowed our four year old to play on the monkey bars at the
playground. What if she had fallen? Am I correct in thinking that my wife takes
too many chances with our children’s physical safety? Or is she right in thinking that I am being
overprotective? Sometimes I wonder.
Signed,
Protective Papa
Dear Protective Papa:
Although I am not a parent, I can understand you
plight. No parent wants to see their
child hurt, but I have to agree with your wife on this one; it appears that you
may be stunting your children’s development with your overprotective ways. A child will never learn how to pick him or
herself up off the ground (literally or figuratively) if they are never allowed
to fall.
Personally, I think you are giving your children far too
little credit. Unless they completely
lack any kind of physical strength and coordination they should be able to
climb a ladder into a tree-house or scamper across the monkey bars at the
playground. Both of these constructs are
generally built less than ten feet off the ground, so on the chance that a
child should fall the drop will not be all that great (remember than you must
subtract your child’s dangling height from the length of the drop).
The next time your children seek to indulge in a childhood
pastime that you fear will cause injury, ask yourself: “Did I do this as a kid? Did I suffer a life-threatening injury from
it? Did I survive to adulthood without
incurring permanent damage?” So long as
you answer yes/no/yes in that order, I do not see why your children should be
denied the same opportunity – so long as they are wearing the proper protective
gear (i.e. pads and a helmet for skateboarding) and the activity does not
involve the careless risks of youth – there will be time enough for that kind
of stuff when they are teenagers. In the
meantime, give your children the gift of a childhood worth remembering.
Snuggles,
Tazi
Snuggles,
Tazi
Ask Tazi! is ghostwritten by a human with a Bachelors of Arts in Communications. Tazi-Kat is not really a talking feline.
